A random, eclectic mix of thoughts, feelings, observations, and experiences – LIFE

Posts tagged ‘life lessons’

11 Questions from Janie

I love getting tagged. I keep telling you so that you can tag me whenever you’re tagged. Hahaha. Janie fell for my trick and tagged me. YAY!

1.) What is your biggest regret in life?

I really put a lot of effort into acting intentionally. I never want to regret. I think, move, act, and exist with purpose. Every decision I’ve made has been based on a combination of my desire and resources at my disposal. I can honestly say that I have no regrets. Everything I have done has been with great purpose, even if it came with a price.

One thing that I’ve looked back on a few times is my move back to The Bahamas (from Canada). I really don’t belong here, and I’d much rather be in Canada. That doesn’t change the fact that I needed to return. I felt the need, although I did not know why. Shortly after my return, my great-grandmother decided to close her business – one that I grew up in. I spent my Saturdays, my summer vacations, and Christmas breaks in her store. I made a lot of my own money helping out in that store. I knew that I would miss it when it was gone. I was happy to be in Nassau to work in the store during it last few months.

My mother got ill soon after that. She has been hospitalized twice. Being in Canada would not have served me well during those times. My grandmother’s health also declined. With every passing month, it got worse, and ended in her death. How would I have dealt with that, in another country? How would I ever get to a place of forgiveness (of myself) for staying in Canada for my own comfort, forsaking the life that I could have been living in proximity to those that I care about?

Regrets? I have none. Reasons? I have many.

2.) What makes you angry?

Ignorance. Hatred. Unfair judgment.

3.) Are you capable of forgiving and forgetting?

No. Forgiving, yes. Forgetting, no. It is right to forgive. It is unwise to forget.

4.) What do you consider the biggest fight you’ve ever had in your life?

The biggest physical fight I’ve ever had was with an ex. He followed me, ran ahead of me, and eventually trapped me in a dark, empty parking lot on my university campus. There was a lot of struggle. Residence security and police became involved. It was a bad scene. I’m happy to say that I no longer suffer trauma from what occurred. I remember it, but it is not a large part of who I am today. I suffered quite a bit over the next few weeks, but counselling and the support of my friends really helped. Let me also say that I realize that the same event could have drastically different impacts on others.

I also had another sort of fight. Hatred took up residence in me. It did not seem to want to leave me. The things that I saw and experienced at a young age made me a hateful, cold, bitter person. As I child, I freely told my father that I hated him. I harboured a great deal of anger against a lot of his family – people who took care of me – because I didn’t think they were good people. They didn’t fight for what was right. They stood by and let bad things happen. There was a lot that I absorbed. I was not expressive, so I held onto a lot of pain. I had things to say, and no one to say them to. This ended up taking a major toll on my health. When people say that you can become physically ill from emotional stress, trauma, unexpressed feelings and the like, believe it. It was a huge battle I had to fight against large parts of myself (and/or what became me). It was years of slow, hard battle, and there are probably still scars, but the wounds have healed.

5.) What is the ugliest part of your personality?

Devil’s advocate syndrome. It’s something I have to learn to control. I’d practiced it for a long time as a way to make decisions for myself, and anticipate any opposition that may arise. It is now a part of me, and I do it automatically. I constantly have to stop myself from saying things in response to the most rudimentary of comments. I don’t want to become an eternal pessimist, all because I am a (strong) realist.

6.) Do you choose to see the best or the worst in people? Why?

I start everyone off with 100%, and leave it to them to cause its decline. That being said, I trust my instincts, and keep my guard up, and my striking fist ready. It’s a contradiction, I know. I have very heightened senses, and I can tell a lot about a person by their words and actions. I see intentions beyond what is readily shared with me. I’ve never been proven wrong, so I continue to trust my instincts. I have them for a reason. So I guess I look for the best, but remain prepared for the worst. I’m also the last and final devil’s advocate. If you need a critique, I am the one.

7.) Do you think other life forms exist in the universe?

I know that it is possible. There isn’t much that I don’t think is possible. The universe is vast, and I inhabit a small part of it. It would be crazy for me to think that I, and my kind, are all that there is. Am I particularly interested in finding out for certain? No. It’s of no consequence to me, as far as I can tell.

8.) If God were to grant you a wish, what would it be?

The resources that would allow me to share life lessons that I’ve gained in my 25 short years on this earth. To be able to teach. To inspire. To encourage. For my education and my passion to marry into a life of fulfillment, knowing that I am living my purpose. I know for certain that my life experiences were not meant to just happen to me. They happened for me. To be something for others.

9.) What would you do if a stranger threw a spoon at you? (This happened to me!)

WHAT?! I have no idea! That’s pretty absurd. Does the spoon hit me? I think that would make a difference, somehow. If it doesn’t hit me, and no further attempts are made, I’d probably shrug it off and go about my business. If it hits me, I guess I’d be in a 10 second state of shock and immovability. Then I’d repeatedly hit the person with the spoon. In the face.

10.) You are sky diving and you realize that you can’t open your parachute so, in a few moments you are about to die. What do you think would be your last thoughts?

What a beautiful world. What a beautiful final sight. This is the best way to leave the world. Seeing it from God’s point of view, in all of its splendor. Untainted by the endless chatter of people, the raging to-do list, or the all-encompassing concern for self. Just being of the tiniest dots in a vast universe, with the best view possible of the planet I once inhabited, abused, abhorred, and misunderstood.

11.) What will you do tomorrow?

Tomorrow, I will run. I will work. I will write. I will drink water. I will show love to my Babe. I will start having breakfast again. I will create a new budget sheet. I will edit. I will be the best me that I can be.

 

Well, that was fun. And maybe a little intense. Those questions were awesome. Thanks, Janie!

Now, for anyone who wants to answer 11 questions, here ya go:

  1. Who has had the most influence on you?
  2. What is one childhood event that helped to shape your present self?
  3. What’s your favourite candy?
  4. Cream or milk in your tea/coffee/hot chocolate?
  5. What is your favourite form of exercise?
  6. What book do you highly recommend?
  7. What country would you like to visit?
  8. How do you like your veggies cooked?
  9. When is the best time to take a vacation?
  10. Who is your favourite tv family?
  11. What blog should I check out?
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Be Beautiful

As you already know, I like sharing things. Little bits of happiness. Advice. Smiles. Jokes. Today, it’s something I think we can all stand to read at least once in life. I spent some time hanging out over at Bloom Anyway today, and came across a link to THIS (and you KNOW I’m highlighting things):

Here are 36 ways to start feeling absolutely beautiful right now:

1. Smile. It lights up your face. It triggers happiness in your brain. It makes others feel happy.

2. Remember your posture. Stand up straight. Hold your head high. Throw those shoulders back. You look confident, energetic, amazing!

3. Focus on the best not the worst. Stop staring at the wrinkle or the bulge. Quit comparing yourself to Patty Perfect. Let your “worst” features recede and focus on your best instead. You have far more beautiful features than you see!

4. Be amazed at the wonder of your body. No matter your size, shape, or age, your body is a miraculous temple. Observe how wondrously it operates to house the beautiful person you are.

5. Appreciate your flaws. You are part of the Great Community of Flawed Persons. Welcome to the club. So embrace your flaws as a reminder of your connection to humanity. Flawed is the new perfect.

6. Be expressive. When you are animated and expressive, the fullness of your personality shines through. What could be more beautiful?

7. Get excited. Allow yourself to be enthusiastic and excited about life. Don’t let your concerns about appearance hold you back from embracing the beauty of living. It will reflect back on you! <<< I admit that I struggle with this. Even when I get excited, no one knows. This was actually brought up one day at work. Co-founder said, “Are you going to show this much enthusiasm with everything?” *sighs* Must. allow. self. to get. EXCITED. Legitimately.

8. Break a sweat. Get some exercise. Put on that lovely spandex and move your beautiful body. Get an endorphin high. Let your hair get sweaty and greasy. Through the sweat you are shining like star!

9. Practice beautiful movement. Try ballet, tai chi, yoga or some other movement that is fluid and allows your body to respond in beautiful new ways. <<< This is my thing for today.

10. Acknowledge your inner beauty. Get pen and paper and write down all of the beauty that you do, that you give, that you create, and that you are. You are a powerhouse of beauty.

11. Show kindness. A kind person is exquisite in their beauty. It shines from them like a beacon of hope and peace.

12. Don’t try too hard. Don’t overdo it with make-up or clothes. Don’t spend thousands getting surgery. Don’t exercise yourself to death. When you try too hard, you look desperate. It’s hard to feel beautiful when you feel desperate. <<< This is my life. Easy.

13. Don’t act your age. Your age doesn’t define you or your capacity for beauty. In fact, age ripens you and provides a lushness to your bad, beautiful self! Live the age you feel.

14. Create something. Creativity is the handmaiden of beauty. Creativity is beauty expressing itself through you. Paint, write, garden, scult, cook, sew, decorate — be creative and you will feel beauty spilling out of every pore.

15. Inspire others. As the poet Rumi writes, “Let the beauty we love be what we do.” Do beautiful things. Live beauty. Be beauty. You will inspire others through your beauty.

16. Stop your thoughts. It’s hard to feel beautiful when your brain is whirring away like a ticker tape with negative thoughts about your appearance or age. When you are trapped in those thoughts, stop yourself and redirect your thinking.

17. See yourself through the eyes of a loved one. View yourself the way those dearest to you see you. Offer yourself the love they offer you. Feel the beauty they feel around you. <<< Now THIS is a REALLY good idea! Love it.

18. Connect with the beauty of nature. You are part of the natural world in all of its infinite glory and seasonal changes. As you experience nature, become aware of your connection to the beauty around you.

19. Listen to beautiful music. Certain music speaks to your soul. It touches and enlivens the most spiritual and beautiful parts of ourselves. Listen to Brandenburg Concertos #5 by Bach to feel your beauty come alive.

20. Make love. No explanation needed. <<< !!!!!!!

21. Wear clothes well. If you aren’t a natural at dressing to suit your body type, age, and coloring, find someone to help you find clothing highlight the beauty inside of you.

22. Hug often. Share loving physical touch with friends and family. It’s a beautiful thing!

23. Get enough sleep. You know what lack of sleep does to your appearance, not to mention your mental health. A good night’s sleep is a mini facelift!

24. Dance. Dance alone. Dance with a partner. Dance like no one is watching. Dancing makes you feel like a beautiful child, carefree and happy.

25. Update your make-up. Make sure your make-up doesn’t look dated, too heavy, or just wrong. Sometimes we get stuck in make-up ruts. An new look can highlight your most beautiful features.

26. Have a beautiful mind. Don’t corrupt your mind with ugly thoughts about yourself or others. Don’t dwell on unpleasant things. Don’t watch violence or negative programs or movies. Fill your thoughts with loveliness. <<< Good call!

27. Stop smoking. It ages your skin, it smells bad, it’s bad for you, and it doesn’t reflect self-love. Dropping this bad habit will instantly make you feel more beautiful.

28. Be outgoing, even if it’s hard. Initiate conversations. Show interest in people. Make introductions. Smile. Bridging the gap between stranger and friend feels beautiful.

29. Do physical work. If you have a desk job, sometimes you miss the beauty of a task completed with the physical evidence of your accomplishment. Do something physical like washing the car, raking leaves, gardening, etc. to see the fruits of your labor. Moving, working, accomplishing — that feels beautiful!

30. Take care of your teeth. Since you are now smiling often, you want your teeth to look their pearly best. White, clean teeth make you look ten years younger. Plus, it’s hard to smile if you are embarrassed about your teeth.

31. Create beauty around you. Let your surroundings reflect the beauty inside of you. Remove clutter. Clean windows. Add flowers. Let your home be filled with your beauty. <<< SUPER important in my life. I neeeed things clean. And neat. And clutter-free. Otherwise, I’m confused, unable to think clearly, unhappy… Not good. GOTTA keep the surroundings as I keep myself.

32. Cook a beautiful meal. Well-prepared, healthy, and delicious food prepared by loving hands is beauty for the mouth and the soul.

33. Reduce stress. Anxiety, a furrowed brow, a tense frown, hunched shoulders are all the physical manifestations of stress. Find the cause of your stress and do something to relieve it. Shine the light of your beauty on the situation. It might dissolve.

34. Exude self-confidence. Show the world that you know you are beautiful where it counts. Your self-confidence rises in direct proportion to your self-acceptance. Love the unique and beautiful person you are and share that with the world.

35. Dress up. Life has gotten increasingly casual. Dress up on occasion. In fact, be the best dressed person in the room. Wear red! Turn a few heads.

36. Express gratitude. Be grateful for everything you are and everything you have. The handful of complaints you have about your appearance is nothing compared to the cornucopia of blessings that surround you. Bathe in the beauty of your blessings, and it will transform you from the inside out.

 

Sweet list, right? What would you like to add to it? Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments.

Buddhist Quote

The greatest achievement is selflessness.
The greatest worth is self-mastery.
The greatest quality is seeking to serve others.
The greatest precept is continual awareness.
The greatest medicine is the emptiness of everything.
The greatest action is not conforming with the worlds ways.
The greatest magic is transmuting the passions.
The greatest generosity is non-attachment.
The greatest goodness is a peaceful mind.
The greatest patience is humility.
The greatest effort is not concerned with results.
The greatest meditation is a mind that lets go.
The greatest wisdom is seeing through appearances.
Atisha

50 Lessons Life Taught Me

You already know I love this stuff. Nice quotes, little bits of inspiration, things to think about, ways to grow, food for though. I love it. And I’m not selfish enough to keep it to myself when I come across it. Gotta share! As usual, I’ve highlighted my faves.

50 Lessons Life Taught Me

By Regina Brett

To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me.

 It is the most-requested column I’ve ever written. When my odometer rolled over to 50, I updated the list.

Here it is:

  1. 

Life isn’t fair, but it’s still good.


  2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
  3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
  4. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
  5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
  6. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.


  7. Cry with someone. It’s more healing than crying alone.
  8. It’s OK to get angry with God. He can take it.

 <<< Ummm… I’m don’t agree with this one.
  9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
  10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
  11. Make peace with your past so it won’t screw up the present.


  12. It’s OK to let your children see you cry.
  13. Don’t compare your life to others’. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
  14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn’t be in it.
  15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don’t worry; God never blinks.
  16. Life is too short for long pity parties. Get busy living, or get busy dying.
  17. You can get through anything if you stay put in today.
  18. A writer writes. If you want to be a writer, write.
  19. It’s never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.


  20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don’t take no for an answer.
  21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don’t save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
  22. Overprepare, then go with the flow.


  23. Be eccentric now. Don’t wait for old age to wear purple.
  24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
  25. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
  26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words: “In five years, will this matter?”


  27. Always choose life.


  28. Forgive everyone everything.


  29. What other people think of you is none of your business.


  30. Time heals almost everything. Give time time.
  31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
  32. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.
  33. Believe in miracles.
  34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn’t do.
  35. Whatever doesn’t kill you really does make you stronger.
  36. Growing old beats the alternative – dying young.
  37. Your children get only one childhood. Make it memorable.
  38. Read the Psalms. They cover every human emotion. <<< And Proverbs.
  39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.


  40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else’s, we’d grab ours back.
  41. Don’t audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
  42. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
  43. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
  44. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
  45. The best is yet to come.
  46. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.


  47. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.


  48. If you don’t ask, you don’t get.
  49. Yield.
  50. Life isn’t tied with a bow, but it’s still a gift…

Regina Brett is the author of God Never Blinks: 50 Lessons for Life’s Little Detours. Her book is an inspirational collection of essays and stories about the lessons life taught her along the detours of life. 
 
She was named a Pulitzer Prize finalist twice, in 2009 and 2008 for columns she wrote for The Plain Dealer, Ohio’s largest newspaper. Learn more at www.reginabrett.com

50 Lessons Life Taught Me | Maria Shriver – StumbleUpon.

Anything you’d add to this list?

The Holstee Manifesto

Sometimes, we just need to be enlightened. And then reminded.

Merf. Thinking is Hard.

Understanding is not a prerequisite to acceptance and respect. … The idea is of radical acceptance — that I don’t need to understand you to love and support you — I’d think *that* is solidarity.

via Merf. Thinking is Hard..