Have I ever told you about Ruthie? She’s this really cool chica who lives in the Netherlands. How cool is that?! The NETHERLANDS! They ride bikes and ish there. I wanna go there. She’s really nice, but she still hasn’t sent me a ticket. But that’s okay. I think she’s gonna send it to me for Christmas. I think…
Anyway, Ruthie is really cool. Did I mention that? She’s funny too. Her posts are funny to read. They’re light and fluffy like clouds. But not the gray kind. The white, pretty clouds. Ruthie is SOOO freaking nice that she did a guest post for me. AGAIN! Sweet, right?! You’re gonna love it. If you missed the first one, click here. It’s about Acid Rain. This one is about… DUN DUN DUNNNNN… THE END!
2012: The Beginning of the End
2012 has only just begun. I know this year is going to be so exciting; it’s going to be so different. There’s a great surprise in store for all of us… The world is going to end! Oh my gosh! Don’t cry!
Yes, I’m so sorry. You actually thought this post was going to be happy with a lot of flowers, cute smilies, sunshine and all that. Instead it’s a little bit sad because I just told you the world is going to end. We are all going to vanish. Poof! The world will be gone in a second, just like the cute foggy clouds coming from your mouth when it’s cold.
When you live where it’s so hot you can fry eggs on your pavement you have no idea what I’m talking about. That’s okay. Don’t feel bad about that.
Maybe you can still turn this year into a great year.
That’s what this post is all about. I’m resolved to help you make this year the best year of your life, because this is your last.
First I will say that I absolutely don’t believe the world is going to end in 2012. That is just not funny, it’s not practical, it’s stupid, it’s weird and like I said, it’s just not practical. Think about it, the Mayans said the world is going to end on December 21st, 2012. Well, I don’t like that date. They could have said the 27th or so, just for me, because I still want my Christmas presents. I just like Christmas. I’m pretty sure the Mayans needed something to laugh about because they were bored, so someone came up with that funny joke.
Even though I don’t believe the world is going to end, I want to be nice and sweet to those of you who do believe it is all going to end this year. So here I am. I will help you make the most of it.
Don’t cry because of the sad Mayan news. Dry your tears and try to smile every so often, you will feel better when you do and you will look much prettier, trust me.
It is ridiculously important you carefully follow my instructions. If they sound mean, then that’s because they are mean. Just wanted you to know… (more…)