A random, eclectic mix of thoughts, feelings, observations, and experiences – LIFE

Posts tagged ‘big things’

Wordless Wednesday + Thankful Thursday

In a block of time where things seem to be going wrong, with a domino effect, I must take the time to be thankful…

For things that have not gone wrong.

For new days.

For fresh starts.

For memories.

For the life that is everlasting.

For privilege to have known.

For the privilege to have loved.

For love.

For friendship.

For family.

For opportunities.

For possibilities.

For understanding.

For care.

For strength.

For resolve.

For heart.

For the fight (in me).

For words.

For warmth.

For beginnings.

And for endings.

I'd had a rough day, but look what Babe had ready for me for dinner. Perfection.

No Thing is a Little Thing

My week is… Messed. It’s Thursday, and I’m still thankful, but lemme offload for a few minutes, ok?

On Tuesday, I got a phone call from my sister letting me know that Mum was being taken to the hospital. She didn’t have many details. Actually, I think she sort of trivialized it. Mum has MS and often has headaches and general bad feelings, so I figured she’d go to emergency, and be in and out. No such luck. It wasn’t until later that I got the full story. The situation is MS-induced and is known as a “crisis” where the MS is basically attacking her body. This whole MS thing is still new to all of us since she was diagnosed just last year. There are so many types and subtypes that I still don’t know which one she has. I guess it doesn’t really matter. She has mutliple sclerosis. It sucks. It’s a progressive thing. It will only get worse. We just wish it wouldn’t. There is no cure. We just wish there was.

This is not my own work.

She wasn’t feeling well on Tuesday morning, but she never feels well in the mornings. She didn’t take it to mean anything, but opted to have her friend drive her to work. She worked for 20 minutes before she had a break. On her way back to her section, walking up the stairs, her legs felt week. She said, at that point, she decided that she’d stay upstairs for the rest of her breaks because she didn’t think she could walk up the stairs again. By the time she got the top of the stairs, she knew something was wrong. She felt her body changing. She sat in the nearest chair, and had a passerby call her supervisor. When the supervisor got there, she was in tears as she told her, “I can’t walk.” Supervisor called my uncle to pick her up because Mum refused an ambulance. They brought a wheelchair which she had to be lifted into.

Up to yesterday, she had no use of her legs or feet. A therapist came and tried to get her to move her feet. One of the instructions was to “Move your foot like you’re tip-toeing.” If you weren’t watching extremely closely, you would not have seen any movement at all. I’ve been telling people her movements of her feet was at about 10%. That’s a lie. 10% is putting it nicely. Anyway, today, the therapist got her to walk. From one end of the bed to the next (not length-ways). By the time she got to the other end, they had to stop. It was far too painful. Since then, they’ve given her pain medication in who-knows-what-amounts. She has been sleeping pretty much all day. In her waking moments, she has not been coherent. I’ve been translating and making decisions for her all day.

That’s enough of that talk. Yesterday was Mum’s birthday. I wasn’t here, but I heard her tell a million people that all of the nurses and PCTs on this floor came in with a lit cupcake and sang Happy Birthday to her. Isn’t that nice?! I know it made her feel good, despite the circumstances. She still hasn’t eaten it. It’s on the nightstand because she likes looking at it. In the evening, my sisters came with a big birthday cake and flowers. She’s said she wanted Edy’s vanilla ice cream, so I message my dad, and he brought it. Leave it to us to have a mini birthday party in the hospital. We put candles in the cake, lit them, and sang Happy Birthday (complete with 3 rounds of “For she’s a jolly good fellow” and 1 hip-hip-hooraaayyy!). (There was actually a big party with catered food, tents, chairs, etc. scheduled for last night. It was a double party for Mum and her twin brother. We postponed it after Tuesday’s events. I hope it still happens, whenever the hell she gets out of this place. 

If nothing else, this whole thing has made me think about the “little things” that really are pretty major things. We just think they’re little because we haven’t had to do without them. Today, I’m thankful for the less acknowledged blessings like the ability to:

  • Walk
  • Pick things up
  • Hold things
  • Feed myself
  • Speak
  • Understand
  • Stand up
  • Sit down
  • Go to the bathroom
  • Drive

It would be wrong for me not to note that the people I work with/for are GREAT. I called Co-founder 1 on Tuesday to ask if I could leave early, and he sent me off and told me to take as much time as I need. The next day, I was dressed and ready to go to work when Co-founder 2 BBMed and told me to go to the hospital and be with my mother. Today, same story. Isn’t that fantastic?! I haven’t had to be worried about skipping lunch to leave work an hour early to see my mother, or sit at work all day, wondering how she’s doing. They are really fantastic people, and I’m really blessed or lucky or whatever you want to call it. I’m thankful for that.

Whatever you believe in and whatever you do (for good), please do it. Hope, pray, think positively, make wishes on stars, rub your lucky charm, speak to the universe… Whatever. Mum needs to be able to stand on her own. And walk. And have full use of her hands. And it would be nice if she could be pain free.

Join the Thankful Thursday blog hop.

What “little things” have you never really thought about before, but can’t imagine not being able to do?